On Tour: A House Remodel, A Magazine Gig, and A Million Other Things....

I'm a pretty focused person, but lately I've been all over the map. I have so much on my plate these days that I'm having difficulty focusing and prioritizing what should come first. I haven't been online as much as I hoped. I haven't slept in my own bed since August 3rd due to a sudden house remodel. I'm absolutely thrilled that it is happening, but I feel a bit "uprooted" to say the least. I'm not grounded at all.

All of my earthly possessions (which don't really amount to too much) are stuffed in the garage and not in any orderly fashion either. I've been switching off between a few outfits for a month. I have a couple little satchels of things with me and I've been living with those and they have somehow carried me through all the house surfing we've been doing.

I have to say that we've been very lucky to have such wonderful friends who have let us come and stay at their lovely abodes during this "uprooting" and "gutting out" process. Currently we are house sitting at my best friend's parent's house which is the ultimate retreat in the city and is situated along a lovely river. I really can't complain. This place is a writer's paradise. 

It's interesting how the gutting out of a house on the physical level can often feel like a gutting out on a mental/spiritual level as well. My husband's handles the unpleasantness of it all quite well. He jumps right into the destruction and gets to work. I, on the other hand, have wanted to avoid the house at all costs during the construction phase, preferring instead to enjoy the new surroundings of where we are currently staying. I am better at handling messes from afar and doing the documenting, writing and recording of the event. I'd prefer to do the organizing and come back when it's all done. I really wish I were the kind of person who could roll up my sleeves, get dirty and GET TO WORK, but I'd much rather write about it. Here's a photo of my husband who pulled out all the old floor boards of our 1940s Seattle bungalow. He's my hero...really!

Here are the good points and bad points about moving out of ones comfort zone. In this case, the comfort zone is our house, but it could relate to any change in life.

Bad Points:

1. You can't find anything and it makes you confused. Things aren't where they are supposed to be.

2. Everything is a mess and turned upside down.

3. You are not sure how things will get done or if they ever will.

4. You wonder if the contractors will show up.

5. You are not sure if you can afford all of this, but you proceed.

6. A lot of fear comes up and you wonder if you deserve to have the things you really want in life.

7. Things get broken in the process and you make mistakes.

8. You feel scared and unsettled.

9. You question your reason for doing something in the first place and sometimes feel like throwing in the towel and giving up.

10. You can't sleep in your own bed because it's under a pile of stuff in the garage and you can't sleep in your house because there's no water or electricity and the place is covered in a thick layer of dust.

Good Points:

1. You branch out from your comfort zone and get to know your friends and you have an opportunity to be part of their lives and see the world from their comfort zones which expands your own.

2. You realize that when you start to work toward a dream, people naturally want to help you and they are much more generous than you expected.

3. The generosity of others can often be baffling and inspiring at the same time and it makes you want to be generous as well.

4. When each tiny bridge gets crossed in the process, it makes you believe more in your dreams and your ideas.

5. You get to try out some new beds (we slept in a lot of comfortable beds) and environments which may prompt you to buy a new bed or get some new ideas for your own house.

6. You see your life from a wider perspective and realize that you can actually live with just a few satchels of clothing and things in various places and still be happy, if not happier.

7. You build something together.

8. You share ideas with others.

9. You see a beautiful transformation that makes you want to transform other areas of your life or at least expand them.

10. You get to enjoy the fruits of all your hard labor and work.

Recently other areas of my life are expanding too! I'm working on two books and I got asked to be a contributor at Shambhala Sun Magazine! Perhaps when one thing starts to expand, its just a matter of time before all other areas of ones life start to expand as well. The hardest part is deciding to take the initial leap of faith and to just go for it in spite of all the obstacles that may be against you. But if you never try, then you certainly will never know.