365 Inspirations—353: Real Gifts

"Being present with family and friends is the best gift we can offer."—Katherine Jenkins

Today I spent time in my office cleaning and wrapping gifts for my family for the holidays. I like shopping and wrapping things for other people, but I'm thinking I'd like to do something different in 2014.

Instead of gifts, I'd like to offer a meal, a day at the movies, time together at the spa or maybe even the gift of babysitting so that my friends or family can have a night off.

Instead of exchanging material possessions, I'd like to exchange time.

Because we all know that no one has enough time and it's just easier to buy a gift, but 2014 is going to be about spending more *time* doing things....slowly....particularly with the people I care about.

If I'm going to give a gift, I'd like it to be a service I can offer or something I can make that is useful.

I want to cut out clutter, get rid of material things...I'm not sure I'm ready to become a minimalist, but I want to work towards paring down my possessions to the things I really use and need.

This year, I will be at a silent meditation course over Christmas, so we are celebrating early.

My immediate family is coming over to my house and I'm going to make a home-cooked meal. I'm excited about that.

I started thinking about gifts in another way. Each one of us has a gift or gifts that make us unique and these are things we can offer—to ourselves, to the world and to others.

Maybe you can write, or do art or you are good at math. Maybe you like to hoola hoop, do yoga, juggle, paint, organize, take photographs.

These are you real "gifts" and this is what you can offer the world.

And someone else probably has something to offer you too. We can exchange and share like this. My husband Yoon is very good at collaborating with others. When he doesn't know how to do something, he finds a person with that *gift* and offers his gift of teaching yoga in exchange.

He's had his car repaired, accounting taken care of, house repaired, fence built, pants hemmed all for the exchange of his *gift* of yoga.

Long ago, this is how the world operated. People exchanged services or materials, people spent time making things for each other. Holidays were about coming together and sharing and offering whatever you had on hand.

Holidays weren't about going out shopping all night and buying lots of stuff.

I still enjoy buying gifts for my family and wrapping them carefully in pretty paper, but next year I'd like to start a few new traditions. I'd like to just "be present" with family and friends, after all, that is really the best gift I have to offer.

What do think about the materialism of the holidays? Have you ever tried to offer something other than store-bought gifts?

365 Inspirations—322: Being Open to Receive Blessings

RECEIVING
Artwork by Francene Hart

"If you wish for light, be ready to receive light."—Rumi

After a red-eye flight to Los Angeles from Hawaii Island and then another flight from LA to Seattle in the early AM, the last thing I wanted to think about was four straight hours of teaching at the college.

Who, in their right mind, books a return trip from a far-away place on the same day that they have to go back to work.

When Kalani first asked me to come to the Big Island to be an Artist-in-Residence and to be a teacher for the Hawaii Yoga Festival, I had somehow decided in my head that it was impossible and just about told them "No, I can't do it. I have to teach."

I mentioned the opportunity to my husband and he said, "Why would you miss it? Get a sub for the few days that you'll be gone and go!" It never occurred to me that with the Veteran's Day holiday, I'd only miss two days of class. Not only that, but a good friend and fellow teacher kindly offered to take my classes.

So I went to the Big Island. I met dozens of people, I attended workshops and shared ideas, I taught intuitive writing, I swam in the ocean and climbed up a mountain, I listened to drumming on a cliff with the full moon above me. I was inspired and moved. I felt energized. I felt overwhelming gratitude.

But some tiny part of myself felt guilty for all that I was receiving. Afterall, I was in the middle of a quarter and I have over 50 students to attend to. My rational voice told me it was impossible, but my intuitive voice was screaming for me to get on a plane and just go.

Of course, I listened to my intuition and I don't regret it.

No one should ever feel guilty for blessings offered. If blessings are coming to you, if amazing opportunities are presenting themselves, if someone gives you a gift or you witness magic, accept it fully.

When I got to class this evening, more magic started to unfold. In fact, magic had happened while I was away. Another teacher managed to arrange a Face Time session for my small business class with the makers of Ice Chips. These women had appeared on the TV program Shark Tank and were face-timed in so that my students could ask questions. They had an amazing experience without me being there.

When I got to the classroom this evening, another guest speaker was there to talk to my students about her travel business. I later found out that we graduated from the very same high school and that she was friends with my sister. A student in my class had arranged for her to come do a talk.

And for the finale, the teacher who arranged for the Ice Chips guest speaker to do a Face-Time session, showed up in class with sample boxes of Ice Chips and bracelets for my students.

I just sat there in a chair watching this all unfold. Things did not crumble or fall apart in my absence, they thrived.

When you are open to receiving blessings, magic and even miracles in your life, I truly believe you will have more of them to spread around. Never block all that is coming to you. Receive it with open arms and share all that you are receiving with as many people as possible.

What goes around, truly comes around. Don't be afraid of this. Never feel guilty for it. There's a reason it is coming to you, be open to receive it.

Have you ever felt guilty for all the blessings in your life? Do you feel you deserve to have what you want and be who you want to be?

365 Inspirations—234: Accepting Kind Words and Actions

"It's really important to be able to receive love and receive compassion. It is as important as being able to give it."—Pema Chodron

  For this past week I've been the recipient of kind words. I have no idea why these words are coming and I feel humbled and a little undeserving, but I'm accepting them.

When someone gives a compliment or thanks us for something, it's easy to say, "Oh, it was nothing!" or "It's not that great."

I don't know what it is about us humans that causes us to downplay compliments and/or thank yous.

Perhaps it's because we don't want to seem too arrogant or too proud.

English is not my husband Yoon's first language and some of his responses to compliments or kind words are often the reverse of what would be an acceptable response from a native speaker here in the States.

When someone gives him a compliment or tells him that they enjoyed his yoga class, he sometimes responds by saying, "I know, it was a great class, right?"

Normally this would sound funny, but when he says it people laugh and find it endearing.

Perhaps we find it challenging in this culture to fully embrace and accept words or acts of kindness. It can be easy to say, "Oh, you shouldn't have!" but why not simply say, "Thank you" or "You're welcome" or "Thanks for your kind words."

At least with these responses, we are fully accepting and acknowledging the kind words or actions of another person and we are allowing ourselves to receive those words and actions as well.

My boss, who has retired now, used to put all her thank you cards and notes on a wall in her office. It was covered with thank yous. I was in awe of her wall and said, "That's amazing." My new boss has a similar wall. She said that when her day is not going well, it helps her to look at the wall and be reminded of the gratitude people have displayed to her. It helps her get through her day.

I now save thank you cards and notes. I think this is such a wonderful idea. Giving thank yous and kind words seems natural, but being able to fully receive them is also a BIG part of this circle of gratitude.

Do you easily accept or receive kind words and actions? How do you respond when someone pays you a compliment?

365 Inspirations—52: New Blog Discovery

“You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.”—Kahlil Gibran

 I will admit that I don't always have time to read all the blogs I want to read. There are so many inspiring blogs and people out there and I'm happy to have met you all in the blogosphere.

Today is a very busy day for me. I have a split shift at the college and need to go back in about an hour to teach my last class.

When I got home, I posted comments left on my last post and, in that process, discovered a new blog. Whenever someone new stops by here, I try to make a point of visiting them as well. I only had time to read one or two posts and the two I read on this person's blog touched my heart.

I think that's what it's all about really. We don't need to change the entire world, but if we can do a few things to make the world a better place for a few people and ourselves, I think that is so important.

The blog I discovered today is called Blue O'Connell's Musical Adventures  and the two posts I read were called "An Unexpected Gift" and "Man's Best Friend". They were simple, short posts, but they were so heartfelt. Blue is a Music Practitioner and plays music in nursing homes and for the intellectually disabled. Her blog is very simple and she has just a handful of followers. It would make my day if you'd all pay her a visit.

She talks about how we often don't know what a difference we are making in other people's lives. We may feel like we are making no difference at all and that what we do is unimportant. The truth is, every little thing we do is so important and can have such a tremendous impact.

I teach English as a Second Language. I have over 100 students from over 30 countries in my classes.  My students are all immigrants and refugees and I know they need English so desperately in order to make a life in a new place.

I often don't think about the impact I might make on a student until they let me know. Sometimes a student will do this by preparing a dish from their country or making a gift by hand. It's always such a surprise to receive these gestures of appreciation and I often feel like it's too much.

I'm reminded, through Blue's blog, that part of the process of giving is also being able to receive.

Each one of us, in our daily activities and gestures, can make a difference in other people's lives. We are all in this together. What we each do is so important.

*Special Note: Blue is giving away a copy of her CD "Choose the Sky" to those who visit her blog and leave a comment. I visited her website at blueoconnell.com and learned that she is profoundly deaf and had to have cochlear implant surgery. This makes her beautiful, sweet song and voice even more inspiring. Here's the song "Choose the Sky" on YouTube:

Have you read any new blog posts or blogs that have touched you or made you feel grateful or appreciative? Has any kind gesture touched you today?